Kia ora

Here is the recount I wrote  for an Asttle writing test in Week 4.  Our teacher marked all our recounts and gave us our scores. Mine came out at Level 3p  which is just above the end of year standard for Year Five. I need to work on punctuation.  

Then we helped each other improve them by reading each other’s recount and talking about them. We also used Revision Assistant to help edit each other’s story and Mrs B added some notes as well. Everyone in our room likes Revision Assistant because it’s easy to understand the marks/ notes that it puts on your writing and so it’s quick for us to go and do the fix-ups. I hope someone will give me some feedback.

Ka kite ano

It was a cloudy Monday. Mike, Mum, and I were catching mullet at Nana and Grandad Kendall's. Mike hopped on the dinghy and threw the net out and it billowed out like an umbrella against the dust of the grey sky. Meanwhile me and my Mother sat on shore. We bought patience while we waited for fish to arrive hoping that there would be some.We picked mangroves and fed the two fat donkeys. Their teeth looked blunt,

although they crushed the mangroves like no other mammal on the earth.

As hours passed I started to grow bored and impatient, groaning like a helpless sheep.And then a miracle happened.  I finished what I am best at when  Mike announced,“We will now pull in the mullet net.”

I wasn’t too hopeful because the floaties were still up. Did we get none??Did we get some? “?No”, Did we get ONE? “Yes.”

It was an absolute pity butt, oh boy, was that one little dumb mullet was yum?

Thank God, Nana Debbie was not there, She would have eaten it all.